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‘One of my eyes cries on its own. My right eye. In the slightest breeze or the hint of a chilly morning. It started this some time ago and now seems to be part of who I am: female, of a certain age, married, mum, tired – and half a face with emotions of its own.
For these last few years I have been walking to work two miles each morning along the south bank of the Thames, from Waterloo to London Bridge. In the more chilly and damp months (that’s most of them), the National Theatre, Tate Modern, Shakespeare’s Globe and the Shard loomed blurrily to my right – whilst gloriously to my left St Paul’s and the river with its many bridges are clear. My right cheek is damp and tears drop regularly onto my coat, as though I am desperately sad. The left side of my face is dry and unperturbed, and making the most of its view. This just about sums up how I am in life right now – facing a load of sadness and challenge, but at the same time (mostly anyway) seeing the beautiful, counting my blessings and seeing the funny side. Perhaps mostly seeing the funny side, if I’m honest – lurching from despair to hilarity.
I thought I’d write about it and see if that made any sense. I spy, with my one crying eye, something beginning…’
July 2023: I wrote the above words nearly 5 years ago shortly before handing in my resignation. I’ve since retired from full-time work and much of the ‘sadness and challenge’ of that time has been relieved. Of course, there are ongoing sadnesses, and new challenges – everyone has these and I am no different. But there are now many more positives and I have found that using this blog has helped me keep perspective on life. I have shared it with a few others from time to time. I guess that’s the point of a blog?? – so now I’m sharing it more widely.
See the blog here https://onecryingeye.com/blog-for-crying-out-loud or from the menu, where you can also find occasional ramblings on random topics.